WORD
21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death. GEN 24:67
Rashi
Into the tent of Sarah his mother—He brought her into the tent and she became exactly like Sarah his mother; i.e., she became the likeness of Sarah his mother. For whilst Sarah was living, a light burned from one Sabbath eve to the next, there was always a blessing in the dough and a cloud was always hanging over the tent, but since her death all these had stopped. However, when Rebecca came, they reappeared (Bereishit Rabbah 60:16).
After his mother’s death—It is natural that whilst a man’s mother is living he is wrapped up in her, but when she dies he finds comfort in his wife (Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer 32).
26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,
30 because we are members of his body.
Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.” GEN 2:23
Rashi
This at last—This teaches that Adam endeavoured to find a companion among all cattle and beasts, but found no satisfaction except in Eve (Yevamot 63a).
She shall be called Woman, because, out of Man—Here we have a kind of play upon words (the words אִשָּׁה andאִישׁ sounding similar): hence we may learn that the language used at the time of the creation was the Holy Tongue (Bereishit Rabbah 18:4).
31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
For your Maker is your husband,
the Lord of hosts is his name;
and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer,
the God of the whole earth he is called. ISA 54:5
Sanhedrin 22b:3
Rav Shmuel bar Unya says in the name of Rav: A woman is raw material, like a vessel that has not been completed, and makes a covenant, becoming truly connected, only to the one who made her a vessel through her first act of sexual intercourse, as it is stated: “For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name” (Isa 54:5).
33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
The first half of the apostle Paul’s letter to the Ephesians articulates the gospel. In the second half of the letter, he explains that this gospel and our relationship with Christ is to be evident in every area of our lives. This includes every relationship. We can walk in love, be united, and be at peace with others because of God’s great love for us and our identity in Christ. In this lesson, we will look specifically at marriage, a covenant relationship between a man and a woman. A biblical marriage is founded on Christ’s love for the church. This love enables us to reflect him in our lives, marriages, and relationships.
We are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ
20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,
21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
John Gill
Submitting to one another—Which may be understood either in a political sense, of giving honour, obedience, and tribute, to civil magistrates, since they are set up by God for the good of men, and it is for the credit of religion for the saints to submit to them; or in an economical sense; thus the wife should be subject to the husband, children to their parents, and servants to their masters, which several things are afterwards insisted on, as explanative of this rule; or in an ecclesiastic sense, so the Ethiopic version renders it, “subject yourselves to your brethren”: thus members of churches should be subject to their pastors, not in the same sense as they are to Christ, the head, nor are they obliged to believe or do everything they say, right or wrong; yet honour and esteem are due to them, and submission and obedience should be yielded to their doctrines, precepts, and exhortations, when they are agreeably to the word of God; since God has set them in the highest place in the church, called them to the highest service, and most honourable work, and bestowed on them the greatest gifts; the younger members should also submit to the elder, and the minority to the majority; one member should submit to another, to the superior judgment of another, and to the weakness of another, and to the admonitions of others, and so as to perform all offices of love: and the manner in which this duty is to be performed, is
Out of reverence for Christ—Which may be considered as the moving cause of submission, or, as the rule of it; submission should be on account of reverence for Christ, and so far as is consistent with it; and indeed, reverence for Christ is that which should influence and engage to every duty; and which should be before our eyes, and in exercise in our hearts, in all concerns, civil and religious: the Alexandrian copy and some others, the Complutensian edition, and the Vulgate Latin and Ethiopic versions read, “in the fear of Christ”; who is the head of the church, and King of saints, and as such to be feared and reverenced; and for his sake there should be a submission to one another; the Syriac version reads, out of love for Christ, which should force the saints to this duty.
My son, fear the Lord and the king,
and do not join with those who do otherwise, PRO 24:21
Rashi
My son, fear the Lord and the king—Fear the Lord and fear the mortal king, but only if he does not turn you away from the fear of the Lord, for the fear of the Lord is always first.
Do not join with those who do otherwise—Heb. שונים, who say that there are two powers governing the world.
The apostle Paul wrote that every relationship we have is to exhibit humility, respect, and love because we understand who Christ is and what he has done for us. To submit to one another means to yield, give way, and defer. This is not easy and is certainly not expected today. In popular culture and society, people are focused on what they can get out of marriage and in protecting their own rights and privileges. However, the Bible says that we are to mutually submit to one another because of Christ. This is an attitude of humility, serving, and putting others’ needs ahead of our own. What is reverence? What do you think it means to do things out of reverence for Christ? How are we to relate with one another if we obeyed this passage?
Husbands are to love their wives, following Christ’s example
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
18 Let your fountain be blessed,
and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
Yevamot 63b:2
The Gemara asks: Didn’t Rav Yehuda teach Rav Yitzhak, his son, the following baraita: A man finds peace of mind only with his first wife, as it is stated: “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice from the wife of your youth” (Pro 5:18), and his son said to him: For example, whom, and his his father responded in this case as well: For example, your mother. This indicates that Rav Yehuda did find peace of mind with his wife. The Gemara answers: She was aggressive and forceful, but she was easily appeased.
19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight;
be intoxicated always in her love. PRO 5:18-19
26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
John Gill
That he might sanctify her, having cleansed her—Being defiled, both with original sin and actual transgressions; for God’s elect, whom Christ loved and betrothed from everlasting, fell in Adam with the rest of mankind; and, in their natural state, live in sin as others do; and so are under the guilt, and in the pollution of it, as others be: Christ gave himself for them, that he might deliver them out of this state; he gave himself a sacrifice for them, that he might expiate their sins and make atonement and satisfaction for them; he shed his blood that he might cleanse them from them; and he wrought out a righteousness that he might justify them from all their iniquities; and which being put upon them, makes them to appear pure and spotless in the sight of divine justice; for this sanctifying and cleansing does not so much refer to the inward work of sanctification of the Spirit, though that is a fruit and effect of the death of Christ, and is brought about by the following means, as to the justification of them by the blood and righteousness of Christ: which is said to be,
By the washing of water—Not baptism, which is never expressed by washing; nor does it purify or cleanse from sin; nor is it the means of sanctification and regeneration, which ought to be before it; nor the grace of the Spirit, though that is often compared to water, and regeneration and sanctification are owing to it; yet the saints are not so cleansed from sin by it, as to be without spot or wrinkle; but the blood of Christ, which is the fountain to wash in, and which cleanses from all sin:
With the word—Not the form of words in baptism; but either the gospel, which brings the good news and glad tidings of peace, pardon, atonement, and justification by Christ; or the sentence of justification pronounced upon the conscience by him; see Joh 15:2.
27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
Paul made clear connections in this passage: Christ’s love for the church is the basis for love in a marriage, and a husband is to follow Christ’s example in loving his wife. Since Christ loved the church to the point of death, how is this reflected in the way a husband leads and loves his wife?
Wives are to submit to their husbands in reverence to Christ
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
To the woman he said,
“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be contrary to your husband,
but he shall rule over you.” GEN 3:16
Rashi
Your pain—This refers to the trouble of rearing children (Eruvin 100b).
In childbearing—This refers to the pain of childbearing.
In pain you shall bring forth children—This refers to the pangs of childbirth (Eruvin 100b).
Your desire—Heb. תְּשׁוּקָתֵךְ, your desire, like Isa 29:8: “a yearning (שׁוֹקֵקָה) soul.”
Your desire shall be contrary to your husband—For sexual relations. And, nonetheless, you will not have the temerity to proposition him with your mouth, but rather he shall rule over you—Everything will come from him and not from you.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
God’s original design for marriage is a reflection of his great love for the world. As a husband loves his wife, a wife respects and submits to her husband as to the Lord. This does not mean she doesn’t have a voice or say. A wife helps her husband accomplish God’s purpose for their family. However, if her husband’s decision is sinful, she is not obligated to obey him. The truth is, love and unity are only possible because of Christ’s example and his love. How is a wife’s decision to submit to her husband a reflection of her trust in God?